“Everything vibrated from its infinite nature: my body, the room, the bed I was laying upon on were just all one vibration of love that expanded and dissolved into a boundless space. They were waves of love, overlapping with other waves of love, bigger and bigger.

Suddenly I was dissolved in Divine Love itself and I was myself that Love, with no one to love and no one to be loved. I was myself and at the same time I was no longer myself, Existence itself was my nature. After about two hours everything disappeared into thin air and I was surprised to wake up in the morning still alive.

Honestly, I was sure I was going to die that night. In the morning there was something vast and completely silent looking amused at a smaller me. Everything seemed unreal, but in a moving and loving way.”

For the first time I realized that I needed spiritual guidance. Before then, although I had met several masters under different and unusual circumstances not directly related to inner seeking (including SS Dalai Lama, Fausto Taiten Guareschi, and Swami Veda Bharati), this desire had never presented itself. All of my inner experiences and searching were entirely lived in private, accompanied by many readings of the ancient Christian mysticism and some more contemporary texts.

Knowing that this opening had occurred without any conscious desire or any intentional action, I simply waited for life itself to present me with someone who could clarify what was happening. Each prayer had become a simple “amen,” “Thy will be done,” recognizing that existence itself, and the Divine through it, always brought what was truly needed.

Four months later, I met Bodhi Avasa in a satsang in Milan. The pot was ready to break, and after only five days I had a definitive experience of self-recognition, in which the sense of being a separate person never returned as my identity, but just as an experience to observe.

“Suddenly I found myself as if without a head, and there was no one watching life anymore.

In a moment out of time, I realized that Caterina had never existed. She was just a figment if my own imagination, and that my mind was not mine, but there was only and always the Divine Mind.

There was no separate identity, there never had been, but only one Self, empty and aware, from which Existence itself arose as in a dream.

This empty light – emanating from a motionless space devoid of quality and that was me – was creating everything that had ever existed.

This unique Self that I had recognized myself to be existed through everything, even that which appeared to be non-sentient.

All of existence was literally grasped as a Dream of a single Dreamer, the Divine itself.”

It took a few months for this quantum leap to stabilize, as mind and body were crossed with profound understandings and transformations.

Avasa’s guidance supported me in going through those energetic phenomena that accompanied this process without attaching to any of them, but developing an understanding that allows to erase the fear that emerges in this integration process.

Encouraged by my guide, I started shortly after the initial recognition to share this experience, although it was only in 2011 that he began to offer more formal satsangs, under the invitation and recognition of Carla Perotti, spiritual and direct student of Jean Klein, at the Sadhana association in Turin, where the great master had taught for many years.

The process of integration of awakening took a long time, while deepening the progressive purification from what Ramana Maharshi called vāsanas (latent tendencies). This allowed me to develop a deep understanding of the path that happens after awakening and its integration into daily life.